Yikes! The Kardashians


Yikes! The Kardashians. I hereby will try to point out to you the abilities of the Kardashians in my opinion. Wait a minute. I’m thinking. Go get a Coca Cola or a Pepsi. By the time you get back, I’ll have something.

I’m still thinking. Is it time for you to eat? I’ll have something by the time you finish. You’re finished eating already?

What about checking back with me tomorrow. I’ll have something on the Kardashians’ abilities by then.

You mean it’s already tomorrow? Didn’t you say you were going on a ten-day cruise? Go ahead. By the time you get back, I promise to tell you what I think are the Kardashians’ abilities.

You’re back from the cruise already? That was quick.

Well, I’ve been thinking, and thinking, and thinking, and after that I thought some more. I must admit I don’t watch their TV show. What’s it called—“Falling behind with the Kardashians”? But people talk, and you know me, I’m always in the middle of that listening with both ears.

Now you have to remember this is my opinion, and I guess I’m entitled to that.

The Kardashians have perpetrated one of the greatest con games on the American people. Maybe in foreign countries as well. I’m not sure whether their TV show airs over there.

You gotta hand it to Momma Kardashian. I can’t remember her first name, and don’t intend to look it up. I think she’s responsible for manufacturing this whole thing. She’s got to be one smart cookie.

I think she was married to Bruce Jenner at one time, but I believe they may be divorced by now. Bruce has gone out and gotten himself to be Caitlin which makes about as much sense as Obama’s foreign policy. The decathlon champion, and the guy who appeared on the Wheaties box, is now a woman.

Have the ratings of the TV show been slipping, and Brucester decided that would renew interest in it, and keep the money rolling in?

Kim, according to reports, has gotten herself pregnant again. I’m not sure of the demographics, that would be the people who watch the TV show, but I think it’s four to five year olds, and I don’t think a sex symbol that’s about to have a second kid appeals too much to them.

I wish I could remember what Kim and Kanye West, her husband, named their first kid. Was it North West? Naw, it couldn’t be. Nobody names their kid North West. Wait a minute. It’s coming to me. The first kid’s name is Canadian Transincidental Pipeline or CTP for short.

I think some classify Kanye West as some kind of mogul, rap or hip-hop or something. He has interrupted an awards show a time or two on TV with his big mouth, agitating the presenters or the presentees. In my time, which is a considerable length of time, I have found that rudeness is akin to temper tantrums which is akin to domestic violence.

But Kanye is too smart to perpetrate that to where it would be visible on Kim. After all, Kim’s looks are her money shot, and I can’t believe he would want to interrupt that.

Some company put Kim in a commercial for this past Super Bowl. What was the cost to air those commercials, $2 mil or $2.5 mil? You gotta add the cost to produce the commercial to that, and what they paid Kim.

I’ve scratched my head to try and come up with new ideas the Kardashians can use to keep the TV show going. I hope these will be helpful.

One of the Kardashian clan should marry an Australian aborigine.

One of the Kardashians should run naked down the street, but only if the show’s TV cameras are following him or her.

They should adopt a gorilla and invite the neighbors over to meet their new neighbor. The TV cameras need to be rolling all this time.

They should dispense with problems normal people deal with every day as normal problems, and get them some real problems, some that actually have something to do with reality.

I remember Kim’s father. He was on O. J. Simpson’s defense team, and was a friend of O.J. In the back of my mind I think Robert Kardashian wound up with O. J.’s golf clubs and golf bag which seemed to be some kind of early contention in the trial, but I could be wrong about that. Robert died a horrible cancer death no one should have to endure.

Robert was not only a lawyer, but a very successful businessman who left an estate of considerable wealth. From what I’ve read about Robert, he employed very sound business practices, not smoke and mirrors.

Wonder what Robert Kardashian would think of all of this?




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